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Anonymous asked:
I have a roleplay partner, but he hasn't responded to my recent messages after a week of not talking to each other. There's no source of friction except with how late his responses are. When he does, he only stays for so long... I feel like I'm becoming more of a nuisance than a partner. How can I re-establish our communication(I'm not sure if thia is the right way to call it)?

Here is what I would send:

Hey, I know you haven’t been on for a little bit, but when you are, I just wanted to ask if you were still interested in roleplaying or not? I feel like I’m becoming more of a nuisance than a partner to you, and I don’t want to bother. Or are you just busy with real life stuff that only allows you to be on here and there? Either way, I’d really appreciate it if you could just let me know!

I hope this helps!

     
Anonymous asked:
First of all, I want to send you lots of love and warm thoughts. Thank you for being here for us, even in such a dark and difficult time. <3 My question is this: is it unreasonable to not want to RP NSFW themes with someone under 21? I've always stated in my rules that my limit is 18+ (of course), but the older I get, the less comfortable I am writing that stuff with younger RPers. A current partner under is of age but under 20 and keen to write NSFW stuff, but it makes me a bit uncomfortable.

I don’t think so. If it makes you uncomfortable, it makes you uncomfortable. And I can definitely see how in getting older, you’d rather have less of an age gap with those you’re roleplaying with. Nothing wrong with that at all.

And thank you so much. Your support means the world to me. 

     

ok, so, i’ve been roleplaying on my indie blog for about a year and a half (i had to move blogs because i was being stalked on my other blog yay). i have a set group of rp partners, let’s just call them 1 and 2 i guess. i just recently started rp-ing with 2, but i’ve been rp-ing with 1 for a while now, even when i had my first account.

1 and 2 are friends online and rp together very frequently. myself and 1 are friends too, and we’ve been rp-ing together for a while also and have many plots going currently. we’re also friends online and talk often and ask each other for advice and such, as we’re very similar people.

this submission is gonna be about two issues if that’s alright cause i don’t want to be a bother and send two :/

anyways, since 1 and 2 are friends, they converse with each other, and in general i’m a very paranoid person and always think the worst out of literally everything . so i just found out that behind the scenes, 1 and 2 talk about me. i found this out because they’re doing an rp where 1’s character rapes 2’s character–out of concern for my wellbeing and hers, i asked 1 if she could tag it to blacklist it (rape is a heavy trigger of mine), and she said she would.

well, about ten minutes later, 2 messages me and says that 1 told her that i asked 1 to tag the rp so i can blacklist it. she then continued and said that if i have a problem with it that i’m a sensitive baby. i’m a minor, and don’t want to see that. also, 1 is a minor too, and i’m surprised she rps such mature stuff for her age. i believe 2 is not a minor though.

i also hate asking 1 to tag things because she also does DD/LG and CG/L roleplays (which is another heavy trigger for me)–i’ve asked her on numerous occasions to simply tag it with a trigger warning or something so i can blacklist it, but she ne ver does, and blames it on being forgetful. well, i don’t think she understands that there’s another person (actually plenty of people) that are bothered by this heavy subject matter. i’m also worried for her safety, and scared that she’ll attract the wrong types of people with these kinds of roleplays.

i just asked her now if she could tag those types of rps, and i know she puts it under a read more, but on mobile it still shows up. i don’t want to unfollow her, but most of her rps are very nsfw and i’m scared that someone will find it and ask me why i’m following such a person who posts such raunchy things. i think on mobile i’m going to unfollow, but on my rp account i’m going to demand that she do a trigger warning or else i’ll halt all rps. yes, i’m that serious; i will go there.

it’s really taking a toll on my mental health as it’s making me even more paranoid and anxious, and her telling 2 about me makes me scared that i can’t trust her? because i’ve told her info that’s kinda private and i’m scared now that she told someone else.


I would have a discussion with your friend. Here is what I would say:

Hey, I wanted to talk to you about something that’s been bothering me. Recently, I asked if you could tag certain posts, and 2 approached me and told me that if the content bothers me that I’m a ‘sensitive baby’. While I don’t mind you discussing whatever you want with someone else, it makes me feel that maybe you’re upset that I’ve asked you to tag these things that I’ve found to be very upsetting and are talking to 2 about it. I also mentioned to you that the information is private, yet you told 2. I think of you as a friend on here, not just a roleplay partner, and it would mean a lot to me if you could simply tag your posts so that I don’t have to s ee it. Unfortunately, if you’re unable to tag your content so that I feel safe, I’ll need to halt our roleplays, because this content is making me extremely uncomfortable. 

If your friend can’t bother to tag things for you after you talk to her about it, then I would just stop roleplaying with her and unfollow her and 2. You do what you need to do to feel safe.

     

How do I tell my role-play partner that she’s controlling the RP without upsetting her?

So in our RP because of the way we divided the characters, we’re sort of each playing as a parent to her main muse and she has basically turned the RP into a pity party for her character… It’s gotten to the point where the entire thing revolves around her character getting upset, acting out, and then all my character does is comfort hers. We’ve done multiple different role-plays before, but she never did this sort of thing before, it’s only recently that she’s gotten pretty obsessed with her own character. She’s confessed to me before that she had issues with attention seeking and got upset when I mentioned that I was roleplaying with other people too because she wanted us to be exclusive, so I’m kind of hesitant to talk to her about the current state of the RP because I really would like to keep Roleplaying with her and I don’t want to cause a huge fight or any drama.. What do you think?


Unfortunately, it depe nds on the person whether or not they’re going to get upset. Regardless of how you may go about it, she may become upset anyway, but here is what I would say to her:

Hey, I just wanted to talk to you about something that’s been on my mind. Please note that it is not my intention to upset you. In this recent roleplay of ours, I’m beginning to feel as though the entire roleplay revolves around yours. (Provide examples). I really would like to keep roleplaying, but it feels very focused on your character and I’d just like some more balance. Can we work on this?

I hope this helps and best of luck.

     

I have a couple of posts in the queue, but I just wanted to update you all.

I’ll still be on here now and then. As much as I’d like to be able to take a break from everything, I can’t, because I’m still wrapped up in this situation, as I have been for the past three months.

I am now my grandfather’s caretaker. It’s just us two now, and he’s practically my father, as my grandmother was my mother. What few relatives I have have mainly decided to go on with their lives, and so I have hardly any help. I haven’t even had the opportunity to grieve. I have taken over all the responsibility, and while it’s running me into the ground taking care of everything and my grandfather, no one else is going to do it and I know I’ll make sure he is taken care of to the best that I am able to give. 

That being said, this blog will be a distraction here and there and I appreciate your patience, as always.

If you&r squo;d like to help me and are able to, please feel free to take a look at my [Amazon Wishlist] or consider donating to my [PayPal].

Thank you all for everything and for taking the time to read. 

     

Update

My grandmother passed away this afternoon. I’m in shambles and so is my family I’m sorry, but I won’t be posting for a while.

Thank you all for your support and patience through all of this.

     
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Anonymous asked:
I know you're in a tough spot right now in real life and I'm wondering if you would benefit more from money donations or getting stuff from your wishlist?

Anything helps. Seriously, anything helps. Whether it’s just a reblog of my post, a dollar, or if you’d like to get something from my wishlist. No matter what, I’m grateful. So very thankful and grateful. 

     
Anonymous asked:
Is roleplaying someone that is abusive makes the writer also abusive? Because i keep seeing people say 'If you like [insert abusive character here] then that means you support abusive relationships. I think this is stupid and silly.

I don’t like this argument myself. Just because you like a character does not mean you condone/support their actions. You can like a character for many reasons and not like what they do. 

Also, if someone writes an abusive character, that doesn’t mean that they’re abusive themselves. I mean, one of my favorite authors is Cormac McCarthy, and in one of his novels, Blood Meridian, there’s a section where some babies get their heads smashed in on rocks. Do I think that Mr. McCarthy is totally cool with that happening in real life? No, no I don’t think so at all. 

So, no, I do not believe that roleplaying someone who is abusive in nature means that you, the mun, are abusive. 

A lot of people don’t separate the actions/thoughts of the character from the actions/thoughts of the mun, which I think causes that mentality a lot. There is also the fact that many people don’t take the steps to keep themselves away from content that they don’t want to see, because not everyone else is going to do it for them. 

I think that if someone doesn’t want to see certain content, then they should simply take the steps to make it easier on themselves. Such as downloading xkit, making a blacklist, simply blocking roleplayers that roleplay content that makes them uncomfortable so they won’t have to see such things, asking people if they could tag posts so that you can blacklist it, and so on. 

Overall, I don’t believe that writing or liking a character who is abusive makes you an abusive person by default. 

     

I’m in need.

:

:

Hey everyone,

I don’t like asking for help, but it’s time that I do.

On March 27th, my grandmother was taken via emergency metro to the nearest major city in my state, three hours away, after a stroke-like event. After staying there with her a week, they diagnosed her with stage 4 cancer–in the brain, lungs, and adrenal glands. 

During the time she has been in the nursing home back here in town, I have been caring for my grandfather, who had a stroke in 2011, is on dialysis (which he takes 3 days a week), and his mobility is very low. A month ago, he had a mini-stroke following a fall, and is now currently at the nursing home with my grandmother as I cann ot leave him alone by himself nor care for him on my own.

I am my grandparents’ caregiver. My parents are not involved in my life or theirs. My grandparents are practically my parents, and if it were not for them, I genuinely don’t believe I’d be here right now.

That being said, I have taken a huge financial hit in caring for them. I am there at least 4 nights a week, usually 3+ hours or more because my grandmother in particular needs a lot of care and aid just to do basic things, and the nurses aren’t available as much as she needs them to be. I run their errands, clean the house, do their laundry, take them to doctor’s appointments, call doctors, manage bills, etc. I have had to take off from work often as I don’t have other people to rely on, which is another reason I’m having financial burden. 

On top of this, I have recently had to make a veterinary appointment for my cat, Shadow, who has also been my close companio n during this rough time. The initial cost for the appointment will be $180.00 and I may need followup appointments/medicine depending on what they find.

This has taken a huge toll on my physical, mental, and emotional health. However, the only help I am able to ask for is financial, since I don’t have any other family to physically help me with what I need done. I have two very important people (and a lovely cat) who depend on me and I need to make sure that they are cared for the way they deserve.

If you would like to donate, you can do so [here]. I also have a donation button on my page. If you aren’t abl e to help financially, just spreading the word would be so very appreciated.

Thank you for taking the time to read this. I appreciate you all so much. If you have any questions, please, don’t hesitate to ask.

Update (June 14, 2017): Yesterday, my grandmother had a followup appointment to see how her radiation treatment did. Unfortunately, one of the masses has grown 3mm, and given her poor clinical condition, she is unable to receive systemic treatment on the other areas of her body, which has yet to be medically addressed. After having a CT scan done, it revealed that the cancer in her lungs and adrenal glands have progressed significantly, and doing further brain radiation would only maybe give her 3 months.

That being said, the doctor told me very plainly that my grandmother has maybe a month.

I have taken family medical leave from work so that hospice and home health can be arranged, and that both of my grandparents can be hom e. This will cause a significant cut to my income, but my grandparents need 24/7 care, and although hospice and home health will be around, they are only here certain days for a few hours.

I’m reeling. This entire situation is very scary and gut-wrenching for me. I’m reaching out for help because I know I’m going to need it.

If you can just spread the word, I would so greatly appreciate it. If you happen to be able to spare something, you can donate [here]

I’m sorry to be a bother to everyone, but I appreciate your patience and taking the time to read this.

Upda te (June 16, 2017): I won’t be adding anymore to this post because I want to avoid being a pest.

My cat was taken care of today. I will receive blood test results Monday.

My income is now $0.00 since I have taken off from work. As I take care of my grandparents and catch up on bills, I am sincerely asking for help. 

Both of my grandparents are coming home next week and it will be mayhem in my house until we are settled with hospice, home health, hiring sitters, etc.

I appreciate any and all methods of assistance, whether it be just reblogging or a dollar. It means more than you know. Thank you for your time, as always. 

     
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I’m in need.

:

Hey everyone,

I don’t like asking for help, but it’s time that I do.

On March 27th, my grandmother was taken via emergency metro to the nearest major city in my state, three hours away, after a stroke-like event. After staying there with her a week, they diagnosed her with stage 4 cancer–in the brain, lungs, and adrenal glands. 

During the time she has been in the nursing home back here in town, I have been caring for my grandfather, who had a stroke in 2011, is on dialysis (which he takes 3 days a week), and his mobility is very low. A month ago, he had a mini-stroke following a fall, and is now currently at the nursing home with my grandmother as I cannot leave him alone by himself nor care for him on my own.

I am my grandparents’ caregiver. My parents are not involved in my life or t heirs. My grandparents are practically my parents, and if it were not for them, I genuinely don’t believe I’d be here right now.

That being said, I have taken a huge financial hit in caring for them. I am there at least 4 nights a week, usually 3+ hours or more because my grandmother in particular needs a lot of care and aid just to do basic things, and the nurses aren’t available as much as she needs them to be. I run their errands, clean the house, do their laundry, take them to doctor’s appointments, call doctors, manage bills, etc. I have had to take off from work often as I don’t have other people to rely on, which is another reason I’m having financial burden. 

On top of this, I have recently had to make a veterinary appointment for my cat, Shadow, who has also been my close companion during this rough time. The initial cost for the appointment will be $180.00 and I may need followup appointments/medicine depending on what the y find.

This has taken a huge toll on my physical, mental, and emotional health. However, the only help I am able to ask for is financial, since I don’t have any other family to physically help me with what I need done. I have two very important people (and a lovely cat) who depend on me and I need to make sure that they are cared for the way they deserve.

If you would like to donate, you can do so [here]. I also have a donation button on my page. If you aren’t able to help financially, just spreading the word would be so very appreciated.

Thank you for taking the time to read this. I appreciate you al l so much. If you have any questions, please, don’t hesitate to ask.

Update (June 14, 2017): Yesterday, my grandmother had a followup appointment to see how her radiation treatment did. Unfortunately, one of the masses has grown 3mm, and given her poor clinical condition, she is unable to receive systemic treatment on the other areas of her body, which has yet to be medically addressed. After having a CT scan done, it revealed that the cancer in her lungs and adrenal glands have progressed significantly, and doing further brain radiation would only maybe give her 3 months.

That being said, the doctor told me very plainly that my grandmother has maybe a month.

I have taken family medical leave from work so that hospice and home health can be arranged, and that both of my grandparents can be home. This will cause a significant cut to my income, but my grandparents need 24/7 care, and although hospice and home health will be around, they a re only here certain days for a few hours.

I’m reeling. This entire situation is very scary and gut-wrenching for me. I’m reaching out for help because I know I’m going to need it.

If you can just spread the word, I would so greatly appreciate it. If you happen to be able to spare something, you can donate [here]

I’m sorry to be a bother to everyone, but I appreciate your patience and taking the time to read this.

     
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